Take care of you first
July 24 is National Self-Care Day.
For over 15 years I’ve been teaching about the connection of mind and body and how to take care of oneself for ideal physical and mental health and wellbeing. Self-care is all of those things. When we take care of our self, we take care of all of that self. At different times of life we have more or less knowledge or money or other resources and we might take care of ourselves in different ways. We can always find more that we could possibly do, but we realistically can’t do it all perfectly all the time. So we pick and choose which things we can do. Our focus may shift at different times from fitness to sleep to personal finance to other elements of self-care. Sometimes it is what needs the most care and sometimes just the part of our life that is easiest to fix. Maybe this month I can’t start a low-sugar diet, but I can start drinking more water each day. It’s ok to pick only a few things to take care of and not everything.
Today I am reminding you that you are worth taking care of. You matter. You are important. You should be the main character in your story. You should focus on you. Certainly there are people out there that have no problem with that. And certainly not every moment of your day should be solely about you. But as a mom, I really know the feeling of being last on the list of people I think I should take care of.
I give a lot of workshops on stress management. And I talk to a lot of people looking for one-on-one coaching to help them manage their stress. Stress management is like first aid or the oxygen masks on an airplane. Take care of yourself first. You cannot best help others before you help yourself. We each have our own challenges. It’s all well and good to say that you should put yourself first, but when you’re up twice in the night nursing a baby, or making toast for a toddler before there’s light in the sky, then that feels like advice from another planet. I promise that it still applies, even if you don’t get much time for you.
Here’s a couple of (free) ideas to help you put yourself first.
Set a meeting with yourself and spend part of your workday in silent mode:
For 30-60 minutes of your day, turn off all notifications on all devices and spend quality time with your calendar, your to-do list, or a specific project that you need to make progress on. Focus on your own goals and spend time being proactive, not living in reaction mode to others’ needs. I recommend time at the start and end of each day for this.
Start and end your day in silent mode:
For the first and last 30-60 minutes of your day (in the morning and evening), switch off from others. Don’t check social media, texts, emails, news or anything else about the outside world. It’ll wait. Provide a buffer zone between others and your sleep time by creating a restful, quiet time to meditate, read, journal, or otherwise connect with yourself and your inner life.
Use lunch hour as a date with yourself.
Take yourself on a walk, to a museum, to a restaurant, or just read another chapter in a great book. Disconnect from others and focus on yourself. Take time to reflect on your own needs and wants. Or perhaps use that date with yourself to accomplish a small personal goal, like writing and sending a couple birthday cards to relatives.
Schedule weekly times to take care of yourself and spend the time on you.
Be intentional about taking time for you to take care of all the little things that can pile up. This includes simple maintenance tasks like trimming your nails or cleaning out your wallet, as well as making time to schedule and attend appointments for haircuts, dentists, and others. When we aren’t intentional then self care can feel marginalized in your world, and you can perceive yourself as less than important.
Optimize your space.
Take time to look at your space and make it easier for you to accomplish your daily goals. If you’re always reaching around seldom-used items to get to important stuff, rearrange the clutter and put things you use regularly on the easiest shelf to reach. If you always need a pair of scissors in a certain room, buy an extra pair just for that room. Small investments can make your life easier and less frustrating. One idea is to spend 10 minutes tidying and rearranging in between other large tasks- you’ll be much more refreshed than if you just try to keep working.
More on self-care
I offer workshops and coaching to help groups and individuals become their best self. Contact me anytime!
