Being nice versus being kind (another CNN collab)

Last fall I had a chat with one of my favorite journalists, Jocelyn Solis-Moreira with CNN as she worked on this lovely article: Being a nice person is not the same as being kind. Why the difference is so important.

There’s a difference between nice and being kind—even our bodies recognize the distinction. Kindness not only pours a lot of good into the world, but it’s also good for one’s own health. It doesn’t take much to harness the power of kindness, and it can be as simple as wishing someone a good day over text.

Being nice involves being polite and pleasing to others.

The difference is intentionality, said Dr. Catherine Franssen, an associate professor of psychology at Longwood University in Virginia, noting that a kind person tries to really understand what someone else is going through.

Practicing kindness rather than niceness allows people to foster deeper genuine connections with others, said Franssen. The more you do it, the easier it will get to relate to others and build more meaningful relationships in all aspects of life.

When people act kindly, the brain releases a hormone called oxytocin (commonly known as the “love hormone”). Oxytocin promotes social connections with others and quiets down the amygdala, the area of the brain involved in fear and anxiety. Oxytocin reduces our stress hormones, like cortisol, and reduces blood pressure.

And… kindness releases more good stuff in the brain!

The warm feeling you get from performing an act of kindness is your brain releasing a ton of feel-good chemicals. Franssen said being kind boosts production of serotonin, a neurotransmitter involved in mood, including happiness. Kindness also releases dopamine, a brain chemical in charge of reward and pleasure. It’s the reason why doing one act of kindness feels so good that you want to do another.

Franssen said kindness can secrete endorphins, chemicals in the body that activate the opiate system — the same hormones that make up a runner’s high. Endorphins promote pleasure and act as a natural pain reliever for both physical and emotional pain. “When we do kind things for others and somebody does something unkind to us, it does not feel as bad,” she added.

Practice acts of kindness today to express love for your fellow humans, and for yourself.

Be sure to read the full article… it’s fantastic!

I love sharing the science of everyday life with general audiences, such as the CNN readership!